New Policy in Heaven

New Policy in Heaven


It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was, that in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a really awful day when you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the next day.

The next day at 12.01pm, the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, said to the man, “Before I can let you in, you have to tell me what was happening in your life the day on which you died.” “No problem”, the man said. “I came home to my 25th floor apartment during my lunch hour and found my wife half-naked. I thought she was having an affair but her lover was nowhere in sight. Immediately, I began searching for him. My wife was shouting at me as I searched the apartment.”

“Just as I was going to give up the search, I looked out onto the balcony and saw there was a man hanging over the edge by his fingertips! Well, I ran out onto the balcony and jumped on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But he landed in some bushes that broke his fall and he didn’t die!”

“I was so mad that I went back inside to fetch something that I could throw at him. Strangely, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. So I unplugged it, pushed it to the balcony and tipped over the side. It fell the 25 stories and crushed the man. Unfortunately all this excitement was too much and I had a heart attack and died instantly!”

The Angel sat and thought for a moment. Technically, the man did have a bad day. It was crime of passion.

So he announced, “Okay, sir. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven,” and let him in.

A few seconds later the next person came up.

The Angel said, “Before I can let you enter, I need to know what was happening to you on the day you died.”

“No problem”, said the second man. “But you are not going to believe this!”

“I was on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises. I had been under a lot of pressure, so I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I think I got a little carried away, slipped and accidentally fell over the side!”

“Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below mine. But suddenly, this crazy man comes running out of his apartment, swears at me, and jumps on my fingers! Well, I fell and just before I hit the ground, I landed in some trees or bushes which broke my fall. But I didn’t die immediately.”

“As I am lying there, looking up, unable to move, and in great pain, I notice the crazy man push his REFRIGERATOR off the balcony. It falls 25 floors and lands on top of me – killing me instantly!”

The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his story.

“I think I like this new policy”, he says to himself. “Okay”, said the Angel to the second man. “Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven.”

And he lets the man in. A few seconds later, a third man comes up to the gates.

The Angel says, “Please tell me how you died.”

The third man says, “You will never believe this. I am naked, hiding inside a refrigerator…”

New Policy in Heaven

It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was, that in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a really awful day when you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the next day.

The next day at 12.01pm, the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, said to the man, “Before I can let you in, you have to tell me what was happening in your life the day on which you died.” “No problem”, the man said. “I came home to my 25th floor apartment during my lunch hour and found my wife half-naked. I thought she was having an affair but her lover was nowhere in sight. Immediately, I began searching for him. My wife was shouting at me as I searched the apartment.”

“Just as I was going to give up the search, I looked out onto the balcony and saw there was a man hanging over the edge by his fingertips! Well, I ran out onto the balcony and jumped on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But he landed in some bushes that broke his fall and he didn’t die!”

“I was so mad that I went back inside to fetch something that I could throw at him. Strangely, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. So I unplugged it, pushed it to the balcony and tipped over the side. It fell the 25 stories and crushed the man. Unfortunately all this excitement was too much and I had a heart attack and died instantly!”

The Angel sat and thought for a moment. Technically, the man did have a bad day. It was crime of passion.

So he announced, “Okay, sir. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven,” and let him in.

A few seconds later the next person came up.

The Angel said, “Before I can let you enter, I need to know what was happening to you on the day you died.”

“No problem”, said the second man. “But you are not going to believe this!”

“I was on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises. I had been under a lot of pressure, so I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I think I got a little carried away, slipped and accidentally fell over the side!”

“Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below mine. But suddenly, this crazy man comes running out of his apartment, swears at me, and jumps on my fingers! Well, I fell and just before I hit the ground, I landed in some trees or bushes which broke my fall. But I didn’t die immediately.”

“As I am lying there, looking up, unable to move, and in great pain, I notice the crazy man push his REFRIGERATOR off the balcony. It falls 25 floors and lands on top of me – killing me instantly!”

The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his story.

“I think I like this new policy”, he says to himself. “Okay”, said the Angel to the second man. “Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven.”

And he lets the man in. A few seconds later, a third man comes up to the gates.

The Angel says, “Please tell me how you died.”

The third man says, “You will never believe this. I am naked, hiding inside a refrigerator…”

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How to Control your Emotions

This is a guide on how to control your emotions towards your better-half, friends, officemates and all the people around you, especially your “boss“. The rules of practicing “ugaling langit, ugaling kaaya-aya” :

#1

Ang naunang magalit ang may karapatang magalit. Pag naunahan ka na ng galit niya, tumahimik ka na lang muna.

#2
Walang taong nag-aaway mag-isa. Pag hindi kayo sumagot o pumatol, titigil din daw ang taong nakikipag-away sa inyo.

#3
Ang taong galit, ‘bingi.’ If someone is angry, wala raw pinakikinggan, so, don’t try to explain and fight back. Hindi ka niya iintindihin dahil wala siyang naririnig kundi ang sarili nya.

#4
Ang taong galit, ‘abnoy.’ Ayon sa pastor, Biblical daw ito? because the Lord said when He was crucified, “Father, patawarin mo sila dahil hindi nila alam ang kanilang ginagawa.” Modern term for these kinds of people are abnoys, so you better not get angry para huwag kang matawag na abnoy.

You should also know and realize that the persons who made your day bad are jewels, because you need them for you to mature. Hangga’t andyan daw sila at kinaiinisan mo, ibig sabihin, immature ka pa. God will not take away those people; it’s for you to take away your bad feelings towards them. You’ll know na mature ka na pag dumating ‘yung time na hindi ka na naiinis sa mga taong ito because you have learned to accept them and to have patience with them.

#5

Finally, the best part of this is to tell yourself na, because of this person, “I will grow mature,” and that DAHIL SA CONTRIBUTION NIYA SA MATURITY MO, KUKUNIN DIN SYA NI LORD.

“The biggest inhibitor to change lies within ourselves and that nothing gets better until we change…”

P.s: Pasensya na kung parang may sira ako ngayun… paminsan-minsan lang po ito.. kaya magsaya po tayo..

What the F***

what the hell with this woman? is she insane? parang nagtatapon lang nag basura sa ilog.  kung sya kaya ang itapon ko dun para malaman nya kung anu ang pakiramdam, hindi ko sinasadyang mapanood ang video na ito ngayon, at nainis talaga ako… di man lang nya narinig ang pag-iyak ng mga tutang ito para sa kanilang buhay…… walang hiya talaga… kampon ng demonyo… agggggggg 😡 …

at ito pang isa… siguro galing sa mental to, at bigla nya nalang nilagay sa basurahan ang pusa… ay naku nasan ba ang mga puso ninyo.. argggg.. babae pa naman kau.. dapat mas malambot puso nyo sa mga ganyan… nakakakainis(kamuka pa ng pusang yan ang pusa kung si “hutaro” )… arggggg…. kung pwede lang talaga mangkulam ng tao.. argggg.. Lord bless this persons heart… maawa naman sana sila, sa musmus na buhay ng mga hayop…

Masahol pa kayo sa hayop… argggg.. tumatas dugo ko sa inyu…

To Lovelyn and Joseph

Happy anniversary

When You Found Each Other

When you two found each other,
you gained the finest prize:
a companion to share life’s joys,
a friend who lightens burdens,
whose company is always a comfort.
When you found each other,
you embraced the love you had dreamed of,
the source of endless pleasure
and memories to treasure.
May your anniversary remind you
of how precious that day was,
when you found each other.

By Joanna Fuchs

September 09 2010, Love is on the air when the clock strikes at 12am. At sa mga oras na yun ay nagdiriwang ang dawalang pusong nagmamahalan… (char.. char.. char..ahehehe). At ang dalawang taong ito ay walang iba kundi sina…… TANTARANTARAN……. Lovelyn at Joseph(palakpakan). sa mga oras ding yun ay ipinagdiriwang nila ang kanilang ika-Tatlong taong Anibersaryo bilang isang masayang magkasintahan (inggit ako 😦 ). Joseph Brought Cake and pizza at the office for lovelyn (syempre naki-nabang na rin ako sa foods.. nyahahaha). Natuwa kaming lahat sa kanilang dalawa… they were so sweet (kaya nag-akyatan lahat ng mga langgam, mula 1stflr.patungong 3rd flr.). At kinilig kaming lahat dahil sa ginawa ni Joseph… dinalhan nya kami po ng pagkain… ESTE… si lovely pala… in the middle of the night (salamat din dahil naka-save ako ng pera, may pagkain na kasi… ahehehe). Take note: dina po nakauwi ang kawawang lalaki dahil may curfew sa boarding house nila…(sad 😦 ). Pero ayos lang yun… may Ice Cream naman kami mamayang 3:45am (nyahahaha…. Lulubusin na naming ang kabutihan nilang dalawa… 🙂 ). Seryoso na to… for Lovelyn and Joseph, Happy anniversary sa inyung Dalawa. And I’m wishing for your more and more  happiness as a couple sana umabot pa kayo hanggang 100years(ahehehe…kalian ang kasal????? Hindi po ako tsismosa, nagtatanung Lang) To both of you Happy… Happy… Anniversary and Love… love… love… 😀 😀 😀

Happy Anniversary Lovelyn and Joseph…

Anniversary Joy

Your anniversary is a time
For sharing your affection;
It’s obvious the two of you
Have quite a deep connection!

I/We send glad congratulations
And heartfelt wishes, too,
For joyful happiness and love
In everything you do.

Salamat kay Brandy sa mga pictures.. ahehehe.. thank you

Lord’s Day

Giving you praise Oh, Lord

Am I happy? YES!.. Feel Bless? YES!.. In love? YES!..  all of this is dedicated to the almighty God, One Lord Forever and ever.

Last Saturday, September 4, 2010. Ay isa sa pinaka masayang araw sa buhay ko, dahil ipinagdiwang namin ang araw ng panginoon(LORD’S DAY). Ang Venue ay sa Gawad Kalinga Site. Ito ang kauna-unahang araw ko bilang isang ganap na “Singles for Christ”. That day was so wonderful… Puno ng praising kay Lord at pasasalamat, Dahil pinagsama-sama nya kaming mga Alagad nya, . I am not a holy person kahit sabihing kasali na ako sa community na ito… I will always be a sinner seeking for forgiveness and love from our Lord. Bakit naisipan Kung sumali dito? First of all, hindi ko talaga intension na sumali sa mga ganitong services, kaya lang nahihiya ako sa co-officemate ko na tumanggi tutal nasimulan ko na naman? And the best part is natapos ko ito at naka graduate ako(mahirap din yun 12 sunday kaya ang ginugol ko.), mahirap talaga lalo na kung wala talaga ang puso mo sa ginagawa mo, andun yung time na halos sumuko kana dahil sa dami nga mga harassments na dumadating sa buhay mo, and isa pang nakakapanghina ng loob ay, yung dinajudge ka na ng family mo. But someone’s pulling me up and telling me not to give up. At alam ko si Lord yun, sabi nga nila kapag napapalapit ang loob mo sa panginoon, ay gagawa talaga ng paraan ang demonyo para manghina ka emotionally and spiritually. And I’m happy dahil sa lahat ng nangyaring gulo sa buhay ko ay hindi parin ako nawawalan ng lakas upang bumangon, dahil alam ko na nanjan lang si Lord sa puso ko. Kaya ng nung Lord’s Day ay taos-puso akung nagpapasalamat sa kanya, at kahit hindi ko lubusang mapapangako na maging isang mabutig individual ay susubukan ko parin para lang sa ikasasaya ng ating paginoon, may nagagawa man ako minsan na hindi maganda, sisiguraduhin ko naman na doble ang kabutihang magagawa ko(holy.. holy… holy…)

LORD THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE AND GUIDANCE, FOR ME, TO MY FAMILY AND FRIEND. PLEASE FORGIVE US FOR THE TRESPASSES AND FOR THE WRONG DOING THAT WE DONE. YOU ARE THE MOST KIND AND LOVING FATHER AND YOU DESERVE TO BE PRAISE AND TO BE SERVING BY US…MAY YOUR HOLY NAME BE REMEMBER IN EVERYTHING WE DO… AMEN

I’m not saying I’m holy, I will always be a sinner that will repent and ask forgiveness to our holy father.


Tagapag-ulat

Kalendaryo

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